If I even meant.

Hahahahaha...

Back when we were still young kids
You used to treat us well, yes you did
Travelling together in the coolest fashion
Your family and mine, kins with passion
Maybe I'm losing some for myself, rap and all
Those I thought were my friends in a brawl
Fuck that, the beat just changed again
Must be me rusty, slow, boring, mundane
But relax, I'm just gettin' my own life back
Before it's too late to sew up this crack
Sounds restricted with the two-by-two bars
Poor flow, with this beat that I really call slow
Shoudn't be da case, but I guess I don't blame it
The society, media, school, you name it
Straight back to the doctor, the dentist
It flips your lid when you are a kid
Like the doctor, put your hands up for the doctor
The psychopath, magic wrath, you can laugh all you want
And wake up the next day tryin' to pray but you can't chant
Then's when you realise you don't practise what you preach

So much for havin' looked up to you as a kid
Thank you so much for tellin' me how to skid
But that's really a history, I admit
Lovin' the life of hallucinatory, fanta-story, I like it
Rather than feedin' off the left-overs of you
I'd come right up to ya face and be real
Coz' that's what I feel, the anxiety and thrill
You could be fakin' it to be chill, pretendin' to be ill
But with all that shit gutted down my throat
I can't believe my ears hear you betray your oath
Your wishes for a happy family, is a never fairy
Tale, diabolical master plan deemed to fail
Everytime I reminisce about footage trails
How you started off bringing us on train rails
Gettin' us familiar with the neighbourhood I call home
So near.. yet always so far, like entry in the tomb
More like gantries from rome, forever a desire
To be part of this growing nation fire
But I guess fitting into somewhere I dunno has always been dire
Passin' off as my background, not knowin' I've been such a liar..

The person you've always looked up to gives you the go signal
To leave you dissapointed, dismal in facin' truth in denial
Peakin' through albums believin' the good guy in you..
But times have changed, I guess one world is better than two...

If you know what I mean.
Or if I even meant at all.