聽說愛情回來過

聽說愛情回來過

曲：李思菘
詞：李思菘

在朋友那兒聽說

知心的你曾回來過

想請他替我向你問候

只為了怕見了說不出口

你對以往的感觸還多不多

曾讓我心碎的你

我依然深愛著



在朋友那兒聽說

知心的你曾找過我

我要他幫我對你隱瞞

只是怕見了面會更難過

我對以往的感觸還那麼多

曾給我幸福的你

我依然深深愛著



有一種想見不敢見的傷痛

有一種愛還埋藏在我心中

我只能把你放在我的心中

這一種想見不能見的傷痛

讓我對你的思念越來越濃

我卻只能把你把你放在我心中



對你的聲音 你的影 你的手

我發誓說我沒有忘記過

而關於你選擇了現在的他

我只能說我有些難過

我也真心真意的等過

Bring it away..

I used to think they were a part of my short life
Like who's gonna be my best man when I marry a wife
But now these feel so distant in my memory
Because as I went on with my life, they've forgotten me
Remember the times we used to hang out daily
There were so many, I gave up scribblin' in my diary
About what we used to joke in that old classroom
Arm-wrestling and kickin' balls that smashed the broken room
And after school we gave it all in matches
We tackled, we stumbled, we fumbled, got up and made dashes
Moments that defined our current ability
So we pushed on steadily and worked hard consistently
Because in that second we had very nice dreams
Dreams so inspiring we formed our very own football team
Though we weren't unbeatable we never lacked steam
A formidable pair we made, I never thought I'd lose him..

Old Article.

Can't believe people also came across and appreciate an article that I appreciate deeply too =)

Stanford Report, June 14, 2005

'You've got to find what you love,' Jobs says

This is the text of the Commencement address by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, delivered on June 12, 2005.

http://news-service.stanford.edu/news/2005/june15/jobs-061505

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rebel_Without_a_Cause

When She Loved Me

When She Loved Me



When somebody loved me,
Everything was beautiful
Every hour we spent together lives within my heart
And when she was sad,
I was there to dry her tears
And when she was happy,
So was I
When she loved me

Through the summer and the fall
We had each other, that was all
Just she and I together,
Like it was meant to be

And when she was lonely,
I was there to comfort her
And I knew that she loved me

So the years went by
I stayed the same
But she began to drift away
I was left alone
Still I waited for the day
When she'd say I will always love you

Lonely and forgotten,
I'd never thought she'd look my way
And she smiled at me and held me just like she used to do
Like she loved me
When she loved me

When somebody loved me
Everything was beautiful
Every hour we spent together lives within my heart

When she loved me

Ordinary..

I wanted to thank God one day for my existence
Givin' me life and strength to live thru' the seasons
But give me reasons, to face all these confrontations
And the consequences that comes with it, lesions
Life lessons, everyone wants to be special
Stand out from the norm, but I wanna be normal
Like another molecule in the hot flask thermal
Sometimes I get angry and temperamental
I flare up 'coz I'm flammable, I rage in my fury
Keep me burnin', alcohol swipes to injury
I scream in pain when it eats into my flesh
Tell me, HOW THE FUCK am I supposed to stop this rash
It starts creepin' up on my arms, on front of my neck
It grabs me by the throat when I get nervous and sweat
But what am I supposed to do huh, live in a air-con cell
Away from the sun and the fun, I'd rather live in hell..
Than to be kept hostage..

[Hook]
There's a cure that heals me..
GOD you're torturin' me..
Fuckin' censurin' me..
Can't I be ordinary?

I'm full of apathy, indifferent to your state of mind
I struggle to live on, but I'm losin' hope in mankind
Schools pledgin' to educate but I find them propagate
Ideology for the people we all love to hate
Nature reserves brushed aside for development
Number one top priority, our entertainment
Homogenizing your world and mine, my culture and yours
Embracin' the carcinogenic burger fleet force
Can't y'all see the fuckin' problem here? It puts me off
We don't see the need to resolve it 'fore the world froths
... incomplete.

history

I don't need you comin' back and forth knockin' on my back door
Pretendin' to be down 'coz you regret your deed when you were raw
You were wrong, 'coz you started pointin' fingers in the blame game
Talkin' shit behind me, try'na defend your image and name
And three years down the road you still wonder why you left me
Alone in the dark, along the paths of hollow, deathly
You had the death of me, but I was reborn on fourth February
An infant with collections of previous life memory
Insane, 'coz time after time they came back to haunt me
Like how many times I gotta say "get the fuck away from me"
I'm doin' fine and I don't need nobody's fuckin' sympathy
So hear me out, I think you need a fuckin' therapy
Insane, 'coz when we meet face to face I don't say all these
In fact it's with you in this time of space I speak the least
Can't bring myself to tell you straight in your pitiful face
That I hate talkin' about happenings in that phase
It's only givin' me the distance between my friends and I
Now I don't even know damn (them) friends and you know exactly why
And I can't hide from history, that state of sorry..

..Beautiful..

Actually watched Disney Pixar's 'Up' when it first came out early this year, but having watched it again on DVD with my siblings just now, I feel that its theme song, "Married Life", is so.. beautiful.

Hope to learn how to play this song on the piano one day!

God Loves Ugly..

Nice to listen to some old music.

Atmosphere - GOD LOVES UGLY



I wear my scars like the rings on a pimp
I live life like the captain of a sinking ship
The one thing that i can guarantee
I'm like a stepping razor, i suggest you stay fair with me
Been payin dues for a decade plus,
Before that i was just another face on the bus
Tappin my foot, to the beat on the radio
Dreamin 'bout the mic and the money and the ladies
Oh mom, i promise im gonna be large
Someday im gonna stop tryin to borrow your car
Gonna go far, with charisma and skill
Until they put my face on a million dollar bill
Atmosphere, its just a ten letter word
Discretion is the name of my cement-feathered bird
And if you didnt hear, fuck whatevers heard
I think you got the sickness i suggest you get it cured
Caught up in the mix, of a bottle full of fix
Im gonna hobble down the street 'til i reach knob creek
Its not that i dont like you, i just dont wanna speak
You fuckin freak
Now keep your days out my week
The world keeps a balance, through mathematics
Defined by whatever youve added and subtracted
Im pushin on the hammer, to trigger the brain
Embrace how i live it, god loves ugly

[chorus]
God loves ugly...

Once upon a time in minneapolis, yo
I damn near had to steal the show
I stepped on the stage, who is it?
My names slug ive come to kill a couple minutes
Whats up with the way, that everybody gathers around each other
So they can steal each others sound
If its all about gettin down with the get down
How long i gotta wait for these fools to sit down?
Appears more clear in its simplest form
Nobody sees tears when youre standing in a storm
Abandoning the norm, and handling the harvest
Measuring the worth by the depth of the hardships
I welcome all the hatred you can aim at my name
I held on to the sacred ways of how to play the game
When the soldiers started runnin short on rations
I began tappin the egg, to spark the hatchin
Make it happen
And take this captain to the gallows
I keep steerin us into an area thats shallow
Talkin to my shadow, he advised me not to worry
He said i should plant my tree and let it rise out of the fury
So give me some light, a little love and some liquid
Im gonna creep through the night
And put a plug in the spigot
And when the water grows
And the dam starts to overflow
Ill float atop the flood, holding on to my ugly

[chorus]

Why scream, when you can lose yourself inside the wide-screen
Let life be a bowl of melted ice cream
Or be the deer thats caught in my high beams
Im rollin with the lights on, scared stiff
Reality is just too much to bear with
Paranoid, walkin around careless
No wonder youre in love with your therapist
Go to sleep my little time bomb

Future..

Just thought maybe I should start readin' up on the things that I'll be studying in university.

Sociology: http://socioblogsg.wordpress.com/events/
Economics: http://www.nus-ens.com/
Political Science:
Psychology:

Can't find the other blogs (if there's any) but I'm gonna start readin up first =)

Well time to start gettin' back in touch with the outside world I guess.

Things to do:
1. Get driving license.
2. Play harmonica/ piano well.
3. Maybe start learnin' a new language?
4. Read up on my own background and some history stuff. Always wanted to know more but never had the channels to learn.

Early dusk..

I thought I'd be fine if I had some time to my own
So I locked myself in the room, I switch off my phone
Wishin' to have some peace to myself, serenity
But on the contrary, I found nothing, honestly
I need some consolation from someone else
Something else, something tells, from somewhere else
I don't know how long more I can hang on here for
Before I drop dead on the floor oblivion what I was here for..

"Back and Forth"

The music I used to listen to had some kinda attraction that none of the other genres will ever have.

People just need the strength to believe in the power of this music..

And so do I.

I don't wanna give up yet.

"Back and forth.. Hold me back"

Unhealthy.

This life I'm leadin' isn't healthy for me.. It's weakenin' my will to live strongly man.

Exacerbate..

I can't take this anymore..

Let me go.

indiff.

I used to hate superficial people, don't get me wrong
I still do hate muhfuckers addin' to my list this long
I still got a lot of clearin' up to do, I still have a whole lot of things to spill
How you said I whined as much as the little brown dog down the block
But you never knew the day would come you'd be suckin' your own cock
Eatin' your own hat, complainin' 'bout the work you did
But FUCK YOU you ain't doin' half of what I did
You ain't gonna get yourself impressed with the people around ya
Fuckin' foolin' around wit the people who made you tremble, ya
Made you shit in your pants, reminder who could boss ya
You just a dirt in the eyes of the many, always actin' busy
Always actin' silly, tryina act maturely, sound immaturely
But as the nights grew older the wind blew colder
I laughin' at beauty in the eyes of the beholder..

Fuckin' indifference I am feelin' inside.

reminiscence.

Some two, three years ago I gave up friendships in exchange for somethin' else..
Now I find people in my situation at that time.. It's just so reminiscent.

Hope some day I'll find you somewhere somehow.

Spark.

Please don't talk to me for the time being. I need to be left alone for a while. I need this break. Perhaps, yea you were right this break has been prolonged and dragged on for some time already. I don't know, months? Maybe years. I don't know how or why or when I ended up in this state I currently find myself in. I need the strength to start anew somewhere, somehow and sometime after this long, draggy 22months 'break'. 14 months more?

I don't know. I've been too fucked up. I hate giving myself excuses, but I need something or someone to get my psyche back up. I just need some breathing space, some personal time for myself.

Like a wick that had burnt too fast.. Haha gotta find some way to ignite it back.

And no.. I don't need a religion.

Why Ray?

We see rays of light every single god damn morning. It comes and goes, but as the dawn lights up the dark with the glittering rays that the sun sets upon the earth, it feels like.. hope. You may have had shit, still going thru shit or will go thru shit someday. I am going thru shit, some people empathize, some people fail to visualise, some will not sympathize.. Some people have their daily dose of happiness, laughter and joy by buildin' upon other's misery. Some people can do shit about it, some people want to do shit but are to afraid, some people just can't do nothin' about it because doing shit about it bears dire consequences that will probably scar one's life forever. I am goin' thru shit. But nevertheless, the morning's golden rays, though temporary and never will be the same every day, symbolizes the hope I will carry with me each day as I put on a fight in this struggle I call life.

Ray is not a name. It's a perspective.

And if one day you can't see the rays anymore.. Hope isn't gone for you.

I know of some people who can't see a single ray of light anymore.. I wished I could do something about it. I wished I can treat them better. But I don't know how.

How you used to be down when the world stopped turnin' around
How you used to smile to me when the others could only frown
But now I find us swappin' positions, in different locations
You used to be active, in the high status quotation..

Fuck i don't wanna talk about it anymore. I've said about it one time too many.

Not being able to see rays doesn't mean hope is gone for you. You just can't see where it's comin' from.

So keep your spirit high, keep hopin'.

Dirt.

Diamond in the dirt, it's here in the heart that hurts
Hearin' the dark whisper, you dance with the lady in skirt
Some wise guy got you disguised to try to get in it
But you oblivion the same guy is tryin' to win it
Unscrupulous, it's ridiculous, his ideas ludicrous
Take a stab at you, take a jab at you, laugh at you
Because you never knew how to counter that shit
And you'll never ever learn how to tackle that shit
It's a hardware written in me that's too much too bear
Encrypted into my fuckin' mind, ready to declare
A war on this superficial shit, you don't know shit
Talkin' about my history when you know none of it
Don't comment if you have no background in the first place
I'll bury you underground livin' forever in disgrace..

Enough is Enough.

Another late book out.
Book out at 2111hrs.
Reached home 2305hrs.

Fuckin' hell some people just don't get it.

I was feelin' like shit, down with flu, and I had to put up with your fuckin' attitude that's pissin' me off every single day. I could have just let you deal with all the shit but no, I had to put up with it, I had to do it, it was my responsibility. I don't need people's acknowledgement, gratitude or fuckin' sympathy. No, I just hoped you could have been more considerate and just left me alone.

I don't need your hypocrisy, I don't need your fuckin' lies, I dun require none of your cockiness, none of your arrogance, none of your I-assume-all-rights kinda attitude that you possess. Please, no, i don't need that shit.

I'm tired of confronting the same shit everyday, so please, please don't push me.

Judgement

So darn busy today. Friday late book out today. 7pm but it's my job and I can't have any complaints so many people would die to be in my position.

Can't imagine what time can do to people I never knew
Just can't imagine how people can buy the case you sue
Can't imagine how many chances in my life I've rued
Can't imagine what it's like to never be understood
Rule of the thumb to always be rude, always be crude
If you never signed up for this then I suggest be mute
'Cause I can't imagine myself swallowin' in my sorrow
Always shinin' glow, shiny gold, but ha, they will never grow..
I'm losin' my thoughts and principles that brought me up
Knocked down like a timbre, but it always got me up
I might never get to your legendary kinda level
I'll never rest my case till I hear the sound of the gavel...