One more step.. To superstardom.

31 March '07
Tight saturday schedule.

9.30 - 12.00:
Soccer at cage! Thien Soon didnt turn up for our one-on-one challenge. Lol. But I thought today's game was pretty much okay. Better than our previous few weeks'. Hit post THRICE. Can you believe it.

1 - 1.30:
Raced from bedok all the way to tampines. 2nd piano lesson. Apparently I didnt make it on time. Was late for 10 mins. She wasn't really pleased, but she didn't say much though. She had to push back the time for her next lesson. Well it's not my fault! Really. I left early already. Lol. Covered through the basics for the keys. Pretty much to cover in a short space of 2 weeks. Just hopin' the teachin' pace will be quickened a bit to pick up things faster.

And I had only bread for lunch. Starved me seriously. And the worse thing was that I got cheated $1! ONE DOLLAR! The cashier can't even count with the help of a machine. Failure of the education system. Lol. And I only realised after I left tampines. Lol.

3.00 - 6.30:
Everything was a rush. To go TOA PAYOH to meet up with jing nan, mandy, jeffrey and yu chuan. Reached there at around 3 before I was lost and Mandy has to come out from the building to come find me. Thanks! Yu Chuan was there since morning for his competition. I wished him good luck in the morning, and it helped his cause! He progressed to the next round (CONGRATS!) but he admitted it was down to luck. And his 'groovy' dance moves. Lol. Don't discredit yourself la! Your voice is nice ok. And that's why you made it to the last 30. Doesn't really matter how you did it. So long as you did it =)

[btw, i want the photos as well]

And like how jing nan felt, I felt pretty bad about making him leave his friends and family for us. But he had to. I mean. I went ALL THE WAY from tampines to TOA PAYOH just to see him. Of course he had to do that. haha. But there wasn't anything much for us to do in Toa Payoh. Ji Soo called to say she was still at home, but she'd like to come find us. But Jing Nan decided instead for us to go find her in woodlands. She had moved to woodlands from kembangan after being transfered to IJ. Convenience is really important I guess. Like for me. Haha.

We were walking around in causeway point basement one when I said I was starving. I wanted to go budget but because of some ppl, forced us to go ichiban sushi to sit down and.. SPEND MONEY. 8 plates of sushi - $17.45! Plus GST and service charge that is. Burnt a hole in my wallet. But it's ok. I'm gettin' my allowance soon! And after saving so much for smth which I didn't need to get after all, I still can spend a bit I guess. Haha. And at least jing nan could complete her piano lesson and yu chuan could emo there.

Wait. And we realised yu chuan knows nothing - absolutely nothing - about our og ppl. At least I had a messenger from our og. Haha! And we were still discussing that day online. How can he know nothing especially after so many things have happened?! Incredible.

Anyways, Ji Soo joined us soon after and we went Gelare to have a ice-cream waffle. She wanted to treat us but since it was her bday, it was down to us guys to pay for her. So nice of us right, jing nan. Haha. Anyways we shared a lot of things there till we ran out of things to talk about. In the end we were down to playing lame games. Yu Chuan'll know what I mean. lol.

Mandy had to leave for family dinner and I too had to leave to go for the BIG MATCH at kw's house. So we parted our own ways after that. I initially wanted to take the other direction with yu chuan and mandy since it would have been much faster. But jing nan convinced me not to. You know why huh. Haha. But it's just speculation. Don't think so much. lol.

We had this plan to find out if it was true, but it failed. Badly. But there'll always be a next time!

7.50 - 1.30 (1 April '07)
Was late for the start of the match. ONE-NIL UP LIVERPOOL. CROUCHIE. He'd go on to score 2 more. And the final result: FOUR - ONE. Yes.
FOUR - ONE.
Sweet revenge. And that sure hit back at our critics, even though it was a second string Arsenal side. Showed what we can do when the whole team plays well. Adebayor hit the post twice, reminds me of me today morning. lol. And through out the match kw and yx were arguing about the match. Friendly debate la. Haha. Didn't really participated much as I was falling asleep. But after winning eleven, woah. I felt much energized. All fired up for our very own 小氣大財神. 4 of us - kw, zhi hao, yx and I. Just nice for the game. And zhi hao is damn ke lian. If he had gone on for the show he'll sure be the biggest loser. Honest. Haha.

This game kept us occupied till 1.30, when everyone finally felt tired and sleepy. Went home after that by cab. yx paid for the fare. Needa pay him back asap. Lest i forget.

That's all for this Saturday. Actually it's nice to be out a whole day. Next week's plan: to the arcade with my brother! Tentatively.

Anyways, what I gotta say is.

Yu Chuan:
ONE MORE STEP.. TO SUPERSTARDOM!
And we'll be there on the 14th to support you! No matter what.
YNWA.

Let it..

GO!

Yea. went back sa today with the intention to meet ms lam and friends.
Oh man. Today was damn tiring. Although school ended at 2.30.
After school CHIONG to sa. Took 45 mins to reach potong pasir from mj. wah biang. and the worst thing was i didn't bring anything to read on the bus. just listenin' to some songs. i kinda miss long bus trips though. coz now i rarely listen to mp3 anymore. Li yun the smsed me to tell me she had to leave school early. So didn't get the chance to meet her. but pat and jing nan were waiting. Pat was frustrated that i made her wait so long.. but it's not my fault! the route from mrt station to the maingate is extraordinarily long! Was i supposed to know? I never took the route before. And the security guard wouldn't let me in just like that. Still forced me to put on the visitors tag when others just crashed in without noticing nobody. And he dragged the time! I was stuck there for a few minutes for questioning -.-

Anyways, after that i met up with shirley, seng yang and hazel at the cafe. Woah. Never knew u guys were SO united. Chunks to talk about. And yea. After hearing from u guys i guess my brother was right.. all the jcs are the same anyway. who needs the reputation? I'm not discrediting nobody but i think he's right afterall.

Was supposed to go find jing nan and pat first but hazel and co wouldn't let me go! Lol. So pat kept calling me and buggin' me. Jing nan got impatient too =/ So i rushed off to the linkway to find them. Pat was waiting at the junior school side. Didn't dare to step into the jc side. I wonder why she's so timid =X haha. eh but really lor.

Jing nan was showing off the finger print thing. Then i made her do it repeatedly!

Patricia was blabberin' about her uniform and mine. Well it looks the same lor! But cjc's collar pin looks nicer i guess. But sa's still the nicest la i'll admit. If i had to choose schools according to uni, it'll be sa no doubt. =/

Anyways, we walked all the way back to cafe. Met rei, sharon, rahul and some random guy whom I didn't know. Rahul seems to have changed a lot. It's not just the hair la. Something about him just seems different. =X And when jing nan pointed to me their gang. Er. Yea. Gives me an impression.

Chat chat a bit. then finally i was to my ultimate aim: to find ms lam and thank her! but she wasn't in 'her office' today. Kinda disappointed. But i'm still glad i met my friends and all. PAE was REALLY NICE. But i'd say i won't regret la.

Plus after talking to Wilson, the guitar club president, i think so. He's like very depressed or smth. Woah. But at least zhe hui still sounds ok, not so stressed. haha. whatever the case and however i'm gonna walk this path, we can only..

LET
it be the way it is
it be my final decision

GO.

that's it i guess. And yea. 07s207's quite nice. Hope everyone settles in their own school asap. And for patricia, look ahead. =D

Recently I've been.. Reachin'.

Yesterday was rather busy.

Morning went to buy uniform, then was supposed to go support Yu Chuan at CSS. But then couldn't make it. Sorry man. Just glad that you made it to the next round. All the best!

Shortly after that I went to Marina Square just to watch Hazel, Mark, Shirley, Seng Yang and the rest to eat at Jack's Place! Lol. Maybe the trip was worth it 'cause of the amount of water I drank. Lol. Thanks though, Hazel. And you actually remembered to bring the cards (I actually meant poker cards) lol! Haha. Li Yun couldn't make it in time then I was scolding her. In the end I left when she reached. =/
Maybe next time lor.

Xue Qi was angry. Then keep tellin' me about her god-brother. Aiya. Relax la. Everything happens for a reason la. Just look at me. Haha.. Just chill la.. No point thinkin' too much about it.
Just be happy =D

Rushed off to play soccer with kw, yx and co. Was drained by time the match ended. Too long never play soccer! Needs time to adjust la. Played till around 5 then went kw house for a while then we left. Reached Pasir Ris at around 6.20 and yewf made me wait for damn long. Had dinner with his friend Wei Qiang also. At the newly opened Kopitiam at White Sands 3rd floor. Yewf's Vampire friend. Lol. But then he didn't eat. After that walked home, chit chat a bit here and there. He's.. Not bad la. Quite friendly. Haha. And yea. Yewf's been acting weird lately. Aiya just cheer up a bit and open up more.

Walked home from there. Oh man. Took like 30 mins. Chat. Nth much though. Was supposed to play fm but then couldn't use. Not like those photos are in a hurry to be edited right.

Just.. Recently.

Meaning?

To actually treat others even more than me, and then come back around swearing you were always down. To lose a great friend and all this shit. Blame it on me. It's all me. Ok. I would rather have sacrificed those times I had and to have it normal forever. It's just not the same. I went around tellin' people about it? I didn't. But you won't believe. I can't be bothered to explain anymore. You won't want to listen anyway. I never even blog about it. Not till this post. Who blogged?

Those no-friends of yours speak of so many lies. They tell me how they feel about somethings, then tell you another. You don't like how I put it, but it's f- up. You actually trust them. I'm disgusted. Utterly disgusted. If I said this right into your face you would say I'm self-opinionated. So what am I supposed to do? Let it go? Haven't I done that? I never bugged about anything. You wanna talk about it, ok. Nobody's stoppin' you.

I always knew something like that would happen.
If you'd still remember what I said on day 1.

And to not see that 'withheld' shine on my screen again.

I lied to you about how I felt, just to let it go. You believe? You think I really felt that way? Ok nvm. For me to trust so much in you and then that's it. That's it?

Upset ur whole entire life? please.

I didn't want to talk about this anymore. But if I don't jot it down somewhere, who would know?

People only read about it, but they'll never understand.

This is not for you, it's for me. This is not an argument.

Can't get out of my mind

I was initially reluctant to go, because of the thought of having to splendering away more of the little fortune I have left. But since Jing Nan kept persuading me to go, I decided not to let her down. In the end we turned up late too - we were supposed to meet up at 1.30, but we only reached there at 2.50. More than an hour late. =X But at least I made it ok! Plus I didn't want to sing at first! Lol.

So Yu Chuan, Rui Zhe, Jing Nan, Mandy, Ryanna and I went to in there to sing first. Wan Ting joined us later but didn't really sang.

Actually for most of the time it was really Yu Chuan and I singing. Mandy and Ryanna always sang together, but their voice were hardly audible. Lol. Sing louder!!

The drinks that Yu Chuan introduced - Mocha Chocolate and the coffee drink were nice.
But the aloe vera was too sweet - can actually get you diabetes if you drink like one glass a day =X

For long periods of the day Jing Nan was talking on the phone outside. I don't get it - we're there to sing! Not talk on the phone! Lol. And we gotta lighten the atmosphere by ourselves! =D Yu Chuan certainly did. Haha..

We sang till 7. Then after that we remained in the room all singing on our own, though the session was dominated by Yu Chuan's voice. =X We checked the receipt after the session too. Guess what! One hand towel actually costs $1 each! It's totally unreasonable.

Went to eat after that went Takashimaya for a while. Look through books. Then went home. Sorry can't be too bothered to elaborate about things. bleh.

遠走高飛

遠走高飛

演唱：李聖傑

詞曲：蔡伯南

編曲：王豫民

愛你錯了嗎　為什麼會受到這麼多懲罰

他們說的話像針往心裡扎我心中的怕

不知該怎麼做才可以放下

只不過想好好的愛一次啊

（副歌）

帶我遠走高飛　不去理會

這一個蜚短流長的世界佈滿虛偽

是你讓我選擇沉醉　繁星守候月不能睡

只因為愛上了夜的黑

帶我遠走高飛　一起去追

有一個叫做幸福的世界沒有淚水

我已經感覺到疲累　只想在你懷抱入睡

不在乎別人眼中是非

重新再出發　能不能讓這天地不再吵雜

我的心裡面安靜得不像話故事的真假

沒有多餘的力氣去分辨他

只不過想好好的愛一次啊

Repeat （副歌）

Letters to..

School was supposed to end at 1pm. But I had only one lesson after 11.30. So I wanted to leave the school early to go dental. Then Kenji saw me at the corridor, asked me if I wanted to pon or not. So I gladly said yes. So I climbed out the gate with him. As in, really climb. Then after that ran all the way in the rain to the MRT station. Bought the pancake at the hawker centre and we gobbled them up within minutes. Lol. Amazing how fast guys can eat eh?

Then my mum called and said she was at Kovan. So I went there to have lunch with her. Hazel called ask me where I was. Outta school by that time. Too late. Skipped GP. Chatted with Kenji on the mrt. He's quite a nice guy to talk to, and as far as I know, he's an IT expert. Gotta ask him how to use some functions next time. He even has his own website! So convenient to use. And all his datas are all uploaded onto com.. haha.

So I met up with my mum's friends at Kovan then we went for lunch. At lao ban niang's stall. Everytime we go Kovan we'll sure drop by at her stall to eat.

Mum had to go back fetch my brother. Had to go dental. Was talking to Jun Xian and realised he was going dental too! but different place. Wanted to meet up, but then Sam Tang called and asked if wanna go watch movie. At ORCHARD. So I needn't have to go anywhere else. But got stopped at Popular there by this sales girl. Asked me donate. In the end most of the time was spent crapping. Was reluctant to donate initially, but yea.

Came across this book on palmistry.. Actually wanted to buy it but decided to search it up on the internet. Superstitious? Maybe. But personally i find it interesting. About the round and flat type of fingers.. And how that defines people. Kinda true when I think about it.. And the people I know.

The MRT towards Jurong at Kranji was stopped for accident. Worried Sam Tang 'cause they didn't know if they could make it in time. They did eventually. Managed to get the 4.20 tickets which costs $2 less than shows after 5pm. Hakim was - dry. Yu Ren, Sam Tang and I all drenched. Went into the theatre all freezing cold..

Lttrs to..
Nice. So emotional I think Tang got influenced by it or something. Lol. Reminds me of the RB Law which I watched with my siblings and my cousins in Taiwan last time. So realistic. People resort to escaping when driven to desperation - death.

Suddenly I feel like going on another movie spree - which I've been already. Ghostrider, Epic Movie, Lttrs, Just Follow. And more to come. Jun Wei says he wants to watch Pursuit of Happyness. And I'm gonna catch a movie with pschool friends. That's so much I can do before this shit gets serious.

Walked home and talked to LY on phone. LY's having sore throat.. Bad one i think. Can bearly project voice. Lol.

Had late dinner with family at 9pm.

And a gold trophy for you. B' Div Netball. Finally something you wanted so badly to put in your room. Congrats!

Forgive.. But these ideas.. It reminds me.
Churning these data. Analyse?

Who didn't?

That's why it's recorded.

NEC.

Reunion: Best friends from past.

Today I went to find Jun Xian at his work place. It's been a long time since we've met up. So after school I went all the way to Vivo City to find him at Timberland! He works at Timberland! Nice pay and nice working environment yea! haha. Then he took an hour break just before his dismissal from work to drink STARBUCKS with me. Haha. Chit-chatted through out. Then the freezing cold atmosphere made him want to pee. haha.

After that he knocked off from work and we went home together. Talk somemore. Talk talk and talk. Things from the past, the present, and the future. Seems like he's gonna have a good time.
Then we talked about how we're gonna organise a primary school reunion or something. Been talking to Lester and Leonard too. Harng Yi says he'll be in. And Adrian just tagged. Haha. Hopefully the plan's gonna be through.

Primary School has been nice, and hopefully we'll keep in touch again. =)

And for Jun Xian, we were goodest of friends last time, it's a pity we didnt get to keep in touch that regularly, but yea. Hearing about your past and your future plans, I know you're on the right track. I wish you all the best for your future. And I know we'll keep in touch more regularly now. =) Friends forever man.

Not like some others.

If..

If you'd still care.

You never knew me. Talk shit behind me, post it online for everyone to see. Well, who's wrong? I never talked about you online. But if you had to resort to this, what can I do? You probably not gonna read this page, but at least other people will hear of this like you wanted. Ok ok. It's ALL my fault. I'm cowardly. ok. I kept it low-profile. I never told the whole world about it. That's why I'm cowardly. And you have to tell the whole world about it. I'm so proud of it.

I wanted to clarify but you didn't want. We can help correct each other in what was wrong. But you didnt want. Ok ok. I'm guilty. You're angry and so am I. Don't I have feelings too? I NEVER WANTED to upset you. Clarifications' out of the equation.

We both were wrong. I know I was wrong to force an answer outta you. But that was to know how you felt. To know what you wanted. Friendship? I said okay. Then ignore and avoid. I became the worst - in your eyes. Okay. And you too. All your friends have all the qualities that I dun have. Even people whom you once said was horrible. It's nothing, okay. It's nothing. I don't wanna care anymore. We both aren't gonna back out of this. You don't.

Wasn't you who said of the thing that love NEVER existed between us? And now you say I assume. It's always me assuming. I contradict because you said it didn't exist? What sense? We couldn't compromise 'cause we never got the chance to.

It wasn't about pin-pointing the blame. It's about cooling down. You said after CNY. So I waited.

Never wanted to blame you, wanted to come to a conclusion and that's it. Now we can't even talk about it no more. I admit, we were both wrong. I don't wanna pin-point. But the tone you use. Ok. ALL MY FAULT. Keep thinking that way and maybe you'll be the happier one.

Believed in true love, but now, NEVER.

Wished to see you smile once more, and don't be so angry.
Tryin' to inject some sense hoping you could relate.

Now I can't care anymore.

Keeper of the Night

Starting to read on this book called "KEEPER OF THE NIGHT".
Think it's not bad actually.
I shall write a review on this book or smth after I've read finish.
Btw, Cheryl, remind me about ur piece. I scared I forget.
And yea. To remind myself, have to buy SAJC badge for Jacqueline. Lol.

SAJC or MJC?
Can't make up my mind.
Maybe there's no more chance for me to change.
That Cindy la.
Psycho me somemore.
Lol.

Anyways I'd like to thank Ms Lam. Such a cool mentor. So nice to chat with.

And yea.
Suddenly I think of you, my friend.
Rest in Peace yea.

ynwa.

Aviation (2004)

Xue Qi recommended me this song.

Wow.

One word, to put it simply - NICE.

Thx for recommendation. =)

Well, it's kinda true.

When a good girl's going bad, she's gone forever... ...

Hmm..

This song is nice.

Not for sentimental value ok.

The past is past.

Bring it. =)

Aviation:

YOU WERE MY EVERYTHING

[Talking:]

This goes out to someone that was

Once the most important person in my life

I didn't realize it at the time

I can't forgive myself for the way I treated you so

I don't really expect you to either

It's just... I don't even know

Just listen…

You're the one that I want, the one that I need

The one that I gotta have just to succeed

When I first saw you, I knew it was real

I'm sorry about the pain I made you feel

That wasn't me; let me show you the way

I looked for the sun, but it's raining today

I remember when I first looked into your eyes

It was like God was there, heaven in the skies

I wore a disguise 'cause I didn't want to get hurt

But I didn't know I made everything worse

You told me we were crazy in love

But you didn't care when push came to shove

If you loved me as much as you said you did

Then you wouldn't have hurt me like I ain't shit

Now you pushed me away like you never even knew me

I loved you with my heart, really and truly

I guess you forgot about the times that we shared

When I would run my fingers through your hair

Late nights, just holding you in my arms

I don't know how I could do you so wrong

I really wanna show you I really need to hold you

I really wanna know you like no one else could know you

You're number one, always in my heart

And now I can't believe that our love is torn apart

[Chorus:]

I need you and

I miss you and

I want you and

I love you 'cause

I wanna hold you,

I wanna kiss you

You were my everything

And I really miss you

[2x]

I knew you gonna sit and play this with your new man

And then sit and laugh as you're holding his hand

The thought of that just shatters my heart

It breaks in my soul and it tears me apart

At times we was off I was scared to show you

Now I wanna hold you until I can't hold you

Without you, everything seems strange

Your name is forever planted in my brain

Damn it, I'm insane,

Take away the pain

Take away the hurt

Baby, we can make it work

What about when you

Looked into my eyes

Told me you loved me

As you would hugged me

I guess everything you said was a lie

I think about it, it brings tears to my eyes

Now I'm not even a thought in your mind

I can see clearly, my love is not blind

[Chorus:]

I need you and

I miss you and

I want you and

I love you 'cause

I wanna hold you,

I wanna kiss you

You were my everything

And I really miss you

[2x]

[Talking:]

I just wish everything could have turned out differently

I had a special feeling about you

I thought maybe you did too

You would understand, but…

No matter what, you'll always be in my heart

You'll always be my baby

Our first day, it seemed so magical

I remember all the time that I had with you

Remember when you first came to my house?

You looked like an angel wearing that blouse

We hit it off, I knew it was real

But now I can't take all the pain that I feel

Reach in your heart, I know I'm still there

I don't wanna hear that you no longer care

Remember the times? Remember when we kissed?

I didn't think you would ever do me like this

I didn't think you'd wanna see me depressed

I thought you'd be there for me, this I confess

You said you were my best friend, was that a lie?

Now I'm nothing to you, you're with another guy

I tried, I tried, I tried, and I'm trying

Now on the inside it feels like I'm dying

[Chorus:]

I need you and

I miss you and

I want you and

I love you 'cause

I wanna hold you,

I wanna kiss you

You were my everything

And I really miss you

[2x]

[Talking:]

And I do miss you

I just thought we were meant to be

I guess now, we'll never know

The only thing I want is for you to be happy

Whether it be with me, or without me

I just want you to be happy..

Advertising Space

Heard this song by Robbie Williams over the radio.

There's a story behind this song, and I'll post it soon.

Robbie Williams

{Intensive Care}

ADVERTISING SPACE

There's no earthly way of knowing

What was in your heart

When it stopped going

The whole world shook

A storm was blowing through you

Waiting for God to stop this

And up to your neck in darkness

Everyone around you was corrupted

Saying somethin'

There's no dignity in death

To sell the world your last breath

They're still fighting over

Everything you left over

[Chorus]

I saw you standing at the gates

When Marlon Brando passed away

You had that look upon your face

Advertising space

And No one learned from your mistakes

We let our profits go to waste

All that's left in any case

Is Advertising space

... ... ... ... ... ... ...

Through your eyes

The world was burning

Please be gentle

I'm still learning

You seemed to say

As you kept turning up

They poisoned you with compromise

At what point did you realise

Everybody loves your lies

But you ahahh

Special agent for the man

Through watergate and vietnam

No one really gave a damn

Did you think the CIA did

[Chorus]

I saw you standing at the gates

When Marlon Brando passed away

You had that look upon your face

Advertising space

And No one learned from your mistake

We let our profits go to waste

All that's left in any case

Is Advertising space ooooohh

[Chorus]

I saw you standing at the gates

When Marlon Brando passed away

You had that look upon your face

Advertising space

No one learned from your mistakes

We let our profits go to waste

All that's left in any case

Is Advertising space

... ... ... ... ... ... ...

I've seen your daughter

Man shes cute

I was scared but I wanted to

Boy she looks a lot like you...

Operation: Yu Chuan

NEW YEAR'S DAY 3 (20 Feb)
That morning. yea. I went Yu Chuan's house with his friend, Jing Nan, Rui Zhe, Mandy, Wai Sum, Ryanna, Ka Ling.

Actually Yu Chuan's house is quite small, but it's just nice for a family of 4 to stay in. Quite comfy too. =) The only thing that lacked was games! We played poker cards throughout the whole visit, plus some t.v. watching.

Hmm.. I shall not elaborate on the details, but the things each person did. Roughly.

Yu Chuan kept asking me to teach him guitar, which he successfully learnt the front part of<< 愛我別走>>.. Haha. Aiya it'll take time la. Slowly man.

Jing Nan crapped her way through, but the good thing was that she participated everything we played. haha.

Wai Sum, Ryanna, Ka Ling were relatively quiet.

Mandy did join in too, though she got sleepy after that and dozed off for a while.

Karoake session - in his room! Lol.

Yu Chuan's best friend, Benedict was supposed to come, but he didn't. Maybe he went in the evening, which by the time I had left. Was called up to watch Norbit but didn't - I had already made my promise.

Conclusion: The food was ok - thanks yc! And I love the big love-letter cookies your house had. And his brother is cute - and quite serious. Lol. I watched with him Discovery Channel! Then he kept blabbering about the sleepwalking show! haha.

Went jm's house after that with yewf, and we did something that was meaningful in our perspective. It's all up to you to decide whether we did the right thing though. But thanks to your mum too, the mini 'steamboat' was nice.

Rushed off back home, 'cause I have school the following day. But still was scolded after I reached home at 11am. Assignments still undone. Song for tmr's test still not practiced. =/

None.

People feelin' they can relate, but the worst thing they can teach is hate..
Remorse.. For whom?

When deeply in love, you don't see the big deal of the weaknesses.
But when love fails, and becomes hate, all the good points 'shrink', in your eyes, and become negligible. And weaknesses become the main highlight.

Like someone said, no one is perfect.

None.

And none, for anybody else to understand.

I'm not gonna do anymore empty talk.. Just let things take its place.

Disappointed..

And none.

Nothin' else.

Prioritising is important.. But when you feel something's amiss, and you can do nothin' to fix it.
Just let it go.. Even if you're forgotten.. But not to me.

Why did you even wait outside? Are you stupid or smth? You wasted 3 days of your precious life away. And perhaps more in the future. And the person whom you waited for doesn't even know it, neither does the person feel for you. The person doesn't even care, from what I see. Friend, I'm being real here - what you did was stupid.

It's not like the person doesn't know how much you've given in. Not like you didn't try. And your reward - not even a word of appreciation, gratitude for your effort. Are you an idiot or what. I'm speechless you know.

Cheer up boy, you're the man.
You're not alone, and if you happen to read this post, just know that, even if you think I can't understand you, the truth is, no-one else can.

Cheer up yea.

ynwa.

Mahjong-Frenzy CNY

NEW YEAR'S EVE (17 Feb)
We had a mini-barbeque at grandma's house, which is supposed to be against the tradition of reunion dinner. Chatted with Victor and Vanessa. Entering university seems tough.

Only three families, including us, showed up at the reunion dinner. The others were busy with their own things.

Reached home and played mahjong with my family till 4am!

NEW YEAR DAY (18 Feb)
Went grandma's house to have lunch. More people showed up. Song-song and aunt kept asking me to appeal to SAJC after the release of results! Some said MJ would be good though, so no worries!

Played with Cassandra, Isabell and Natasha after lunch. Showed them some 'magic tricks'. Three cute girls, but they are like obsessed with magic! Lol. Then they kept asking me to 'do it again' and to teach them. But magic is not learnt to be taught. Wanted to take their photos but they're so camera-shy! Kept shunning away from the camera. Lol.

Stan smsed me 'coz he was bored. Nothing much else I guess.

We went to the temple after lunch before heading home to have a break. Didn't really take too long a break as we had to return to grandma's house for dinner in the evening. After dinner watched 突然發財 on Channel 8. Didn't get to watch finish the whole thing though. Had to leave half-way.

Yewf was telling me what happened on his side on the phone. He like over-excited or something. haha. Then he happened to be watching the same show on Channel 8! Omg the show is damn lame.

Then we started to play mahjong at around 10pm. Stopped the game to pick up my brother from work. Then continued to play from 12pm to 6am! =)

NEW YEAR'S DAY 2 (19 Feb)
Went cousin Steven's house to have lunch. A lot of people were there too! They didn't give us red-packets though. -.- But ok la, I'm fine with it. Played computer games with Shaun and crapped. The food was nice, all cooked by my aunt! Sure is a good cook. And the chocolate mint cake made by my cousin's wife is simply - heaven.

Edmund and Susan came right after lunch for around 2 hours till 3pm, when they had to leave 'cause someone was going over to their place. But the three kids, like yesterday, were still figuring out the magic we showed them yesterday. Taught them how to play BLUFF and HEART-ATTACK! =)

After they left, we sat down to watch JJ's concert on Channel U. Coicindentally, Mayday's concert was on another channel. =/

And guess what. Steven said he could help me get Mayday's concert tickets next time! =)

What a gain for this CNY!

Ghostrider

Went back to school today, despite being sick.
Went to have breakfast with my dad, before picking up Gabriel at Tanah Merah mrt and proceeding to school after that.

We reached school at around 9.50. then took some photos. The guard kept staring at us, and made us sign the visitors thing. Lol. What for. We called Mr Toh to come and save us! haha. He was actually late for lesson but he still came to our 'rescue'. Lol. Then he rushed off immediately after that.

First person we saw - Ms Woon. She saw Gab and hit him hard on the arm. Lol. Kept complaining about gab's grades. And reprimanded him for not dropping the subject. She kept saying that she knew gab couldn't cope with it. Then some tall, Indian student of hers came to see her. She got distracted and then Gab and I rushed off to the canteen to get a drink. Gab tried to avoid Eddie Tan, but couldn't. We wished him Happy New Year, chatted a while and moved on to find KC Tan at staff room. In the end he wasn't there, but we met Mr Sara. Wei Choy called me, wanted to find us at staff room, but went to hiding after seeing Mr Sara. For what. Lol.

So we headed for the hall to catch the performance. It wasn't that nice though. Shit la. Wasted my time. Shoulda went for school today. Lol. Only thing I got from going back was the yellow piece of paper to join the alumni.. Not many people went back school though.

But the main thing was I helped a friend sort out some differences.

Sam Tang called me and told me that they reached TM already. They were gonna have their lunch first. Gab and I rushed to board bus 10 and reached TM at around 12. Sam Lee, Yu Ren and Sam Tang were there already. Jun Wei was still on his way there. So we went to buy the tickets first. We walked past Pastamania, and samuel tang reminded me that samuel wee works there. Went in to say 'hi' to him. My sister was there and she kept calling me. But I didn't realise. In the end she called me when I left Pastamania. Ran all the way back just to see her! haha! =)

Not long after Jun Wei arrived and he, together with Gab and I, went to eat while the other 3 went to play arcade. Lol. We crapped our way through and I didn't know Jun Wei turned GAY! Haha. So lame.

We met up afterwards, and after stoning for a while, we agreed to split up. Tang and I went to buy drink while the rest went toilet. Save time. Actually we only had 10 mins left. But Tang wasn't concerned at all. Still took his time to stroll down to the basement NTUC. Ask him hurry up he kept replying 'aiya still have time'. Really relaxed leh he. Lol.

Catched movie. Had quite a few hilarious parts if you think more to what's on the surface. Lol. Parts like 'look into my eyes!' and 'forget your friends, family, love - you're mine'. Those who nv watch won't understand la. Lol.

The movie's quite nice - although frankly speaking the storyline wasn't clear - the story moved on too quickly, and the good guy won too easily. Not really thrilling. Kinda anti-climax especially towards the end. Rating: 7/10. Next movie to watch: EPIC MOVIE. Looks crappy enough. lol.

Jun Wei kept asking us to go play pool, but after much dileberation and time wasting, it didn't work out. Went back home instead.

Helped tidy up the place to prepare for CNY.

Old Song

Old song. Nobody said nobody can't listen to old songs.

Yewf and I were talking till we suddenly brought up about this song.

YOU AND I BOTH
Jason Mraz

Was it you who spoke the words that things would happen but not to me
Oh things are gonna happen naturally
Oh taking your advice I'm looking on the bright side
And balancing the whole thing
But often times those words get tangled up in lines
And the bright lights turn to night
Until the dawn it brings
Another day to sing about the magic that was you and me

Cause you and I both loved
What you and I spoke of
And others just read of
Others only read of the love, the love that I love.

See I'm all about them words
Over numbers, unencumbered numbered words
Hundreds of pages, pages, pages forwards
More words then I had ever heard and I feel so alive

You and I, you and I
Not so little you and I anymore
And with this silence brings a moral story
More importantly evolving is the glory of a boy

Cause you and I both loved
What you and I spoke of
And others just dream of
And if you could see me now
Well I'm almost finally out ofI'm finally out of
Finally deedeedeedee
Well I'm almost finally, finally
Well I'm free, oh, I'm free

And it's okay if you have go away
Oh just remember the telephone works both ways
And if I never ever hear them ring
If nothing else I'll think the bells inside
Have finally found you someone else and that's okay
Cause I'll remember everything you sang

Cause you and I both loved what you and I spoke of
And others just read of and if you could see now
Well I'm almost finally out of.
I'm finally out of, finally, deedeeededede
Well I'm almost finally, finally, finally out of words

Why am I even doing all these

Went to the market with my mum in the morning. Rented some magazines and books before buying lunch for my siblings.

After that my mum's friend called for us to go wash spa. So i went back home, changed and went out with her there. My first time, and the feeling was really nice. Feel more refreshed now. lol.

After that I went to 羅志祥's autograph session with her to get my sister's album autographed. Hell lot of people. Waited for 5 exhausting hours standing! I don't even know why I am even doing these kinda things.

Waiting for things that I know it won't happen at all..

Maybe it's just faith that keeps me going.. Maybe.

Faith.

Faith certainly tells us what the senses do not, but not the contrary of what they see; it is above, not against them. - Blaise Pascal.

This is lame.

School was, as usual, the same.

First, we had P.E. in the morning. We played handball. I felt I played pretty well until I twisted my ankle.. Kinda pain now, but could still walk a bit.. Hopefully it won't be as painful tmr. Lol. Li Yun was making fun of me saying I shouldn't cross the dotted line. But well, am i supposed to focus on the game or the space where I'm standing on? lol. nvm la.. the rules are so troublesome for me to follow. lol.

After P.E. we had Chemistry lecture immediately. I sat beside Hazel and Mark. Chit-chatted for a while and was smsing throughout the whole lesson. In the end I didn't get what the lesson was about. Man. It's all pat's fault la. Keep askin' me about guitar lesson. lol. Still say I stone somemore. lol.

Following that was 1.5 hours of break. I can't really rmbr what I did though, but I was hanging around with O.G. people discussing about the Angel and Mortal thing. Then I decided to go S.C. there to find my classmates. They were playing carom. This is so lame. I'd rather go to work.. Perhaps working would be more productive. Sounds so hip too.

Then we went for maths lecture which was conducted by Ms. Chan. Attitude problem man. Dunno what's wrong with her. Kept shouting.
"If you don't shut up I'll ask you all to come and sit at the chairs right in front of me!"
"We're gonna spend ur C.T. funds on buying masking tapes to tape ur mouth!"
Yea yea. W/e.
Some people were laughing for no reason. This is lame.

1 p.m. Time for G.P. tutorial. But Mr Pang had to leave at 1.30 for some course. He's always going for some course. Went through arguments and explanation. That's about it I guess. Then we discussed about several issues, like "The implementation of I.R. should be abolised". But it was Tejas doing all the work. Well. I dunno. Lucas, Chong Yi, Zhi Li, Sean, Seng Yang were doing the debate on "pms should be encouraged'. And they made a fool out of it. If it were me I would do the same. They had a nice approach though.
"Promotes new industries, practice for newbies, to have better life"
This is lame.

Break again. I went cafe to find O.G. people. Then had a chat with Yu Chuan.. Then I was wonderin' if I should go guitar. I went to get my guitar and crapped with the seniors for a while.. He actually didn't stop me from pon-ning the session. Lol. So I decided to leave school anyway. And walked to the MRT station with YC. Bought bubble tea on the way. The bubble tea outside school is not bad actually. Not too sweet and just nice. =)

Suddenly we talked about online games and he talked about the various games he played when he was in Sec. 2 (GB) and Sec. 3 (MU). Lol. Life is about games? I haven't really settled down and played a game properly for a long, Long, LOng, LONg, LONG time.

So we decided to relive the moment. We went back home straight and played this entirely lame game. But I kinda enjoyed it though. For no reason. Haha.. YC thanks for accompanying me ya. Thx. =)

Suddenly I feel like talking about Miss Lam. But well, I'll pen it down one day. That's all for now. =)

My day summed up with three words:
LAME,

but nice.

Unfinished business

A mole of hoes acting like it's none of their business, takin'
A turn for the worse, like a bomb in the tomb right about to burst
Quench my thirst, but first, shut the fuck up and listen to my verse
Immerse yourself in the music, must you just be so robust and cussed
Rumours disgust, attractin' cretins, twirlin' in the media gust
Outcastes, never past the task, always unmasked, and ever out-classed
Sprectrums, influence through the cranium like penetrative radium
Intra-reflections through refractions, indexes of mediums
Unvarnished facts, double the taxes and troubles with the sexes
Livin' the devil, sniffin' the revels, he contracts and relaxes

..Unfinished.
Let's do it all over again.
Fuck the past..
My childhood, adolescent years, and the the new phase.
I'm in the 'let's do this shit for real' kinda mood.

The Revival
4th February 2007
and beyond

我知道..

《而我知道》

作詞：阿信　作曲：阿信　編曲：五月天

冰塊　還沒融化　你在看錶

我　笑的尷尬你說　最近很忙　改天聊吧

那天　我在樓下　想了很久　想　你說的話

你說　愛情很窄　世界很大(而我們應該長大)

就這樣吧　就這樣吧　我想我　聽懂你　話中的話

而我知道那真愛不一定能白頭到老

而我知道有一天你可能就這麼走掉

而我知道我知道這一切我全都知道

我就是受不了

而我知道我們曾天真的一起哭和笑

而我知道放開手但不知道怎麼忘掉

而我知道你走了以後的每一分每一秒

卻還是這麼難敖

微笑　緊緊咬牙　給你祝福　你　自由飛吧

你說　溫室沒有燦爛的花(你總是很有想法)

就這樣吧　就這樣吧

我同意　可是我　淚如雨下

《分手吧》-張震嶽

寫一封沒有地址的信

想寄到妳的心裡

告訴妳漸漸變淡的愛

妳是否曾經注意

過去的美麗日子已經不再

我還在傻傻地找尋

也許妳想要說但說不出口

我知道妳想說...

分手吧 我們分手吧

不要再騙我說妳還愛著我

妳我的夢 彼此的不同

就算是當作一時糊塗愛錯

分手吧 我們分手吧

不要再騙我說妳還愛著我

妳我的夢 彼此的不同

就算是當作一時糊塗愛錯

两人世界

兩人世界

有你的溫柔伴在我身旁

有你的勇敢堅持著我的喜歡

只要能夠多看你一秒

感覺到我對你的期望

如果你的淚水又不經意滑落

如果真是謊言已分不清

如果我有牽起你的手

你到底會不會把它緊緊握著

我們曾經喜歡過擁抱過親吻過

現在卻像一場夢一醒只剰空

但我不管我是否曾經擁有著
只求自己再相信愛你不是個錯

有你的微笑世界變得美好

有你的氣息孤獨便離我而去

只要不能再望一秒
就不見沒有你的煎熬

如果我放手能換取你的自由

如果這一走不再回頭

如果我們這樣就結束

你到底會不會感到一絲難過

我們曾經打閙過曖昧過牽著過

現在卻像陌生人揮手也懶惰

但我不管我是否曾經擁有過

只求自己再相信愛你不是個錯

難道朋友應該矜持與此而不要變情人

難道愛是那麽的脆弱那麽經不起考驗

Wonderful piece in my opinion.

Thanks, Cheryl =)

You have made a difference in my life

Child - Adult HOOD

Ice cream, eatin' while i'm screamin' in my own dream
Mixin' around with those from the ghetto, my own team
Those were the times I'd say I really loved the most
The times I shared with myself and nobody else
Enraged devil in madness, killin' everybody else
Ostracised, un-socialised, why the fuck bother?
Could'a never been born, un-fertilized, why, father?
Never understood, buffer-zone makin' me all alone
Never lived through boy-hood, i'm a deadwood, I am home-grown
But what is home? The place where the heart is? Where is it?
I can't find it within me.. This holy place is lonely
My friends befriend me, I love this girl wholeheartedly
They knowin' me inside out? I'ma knock you out
Turnin' points of life, breakin' points to fade you out
Checkin' points to check you out, at gunpoint, played me out
Strike out in the game, this moment I feel I'm worn out..

[Hook]
I still remember the times we had
But we can't go back
I still remember the friends I had
But y'all can't come back
Even with the time machine I wish I had
But I won't go back
Prayin' for the innocence we had
But we can't go back

Death comes in threes, and everytime I breathe
I see the shadow in me, the past sorrows in me
Sin-forgiver who never wished for this to happen
Hell should never exist, look what happened to 'em?
She didn't want to grow up, losin' thy innocence
No concern for motherfuckers, freely speakin' nonsense
But fuck it, when we were young we wanted to grow up
Filled with ambitions and dreams, part of the adult set-up
But when we got older we didn't want to grow up no mo
Life is hard, we bein' torn' us apart, don't be sure
I could be doing all the shit that I wanted
Restrictions, limitations, we like preys bein' hunted
Used to think that those fairy-tale loves that existed
Fuck cash, the root of all evil, we weaklings are ousted
The writers, THEM! We livin' out our life-spans drawn out
I don't see the love in true love anymore, who's worn out?


[Hook]


The Death
23 October 2006 - 3 Febuary 2007


Fuck your love songs.

Reminisence.. of those St. Andrew's Days.

Today was cross country at east coast park.
We were consistent ok.
I, Romit, Jothi and some other guy walked throughout the cross country and chit-chatted for like 1 hour. Even the WaiSum, Zhen Ying, Polly caught up with us after they started off from the mark 30 mins later. Around there la. Anyways it was full of bullshit. Romit blabbering about Adjit and Jothi and I crappin around. lol.

Then after we reached the finishing point, we actually forgot to take our cup of milo. wasted. ha. romit was then playin' around with a pair of sunglasses. then during the mascot, we were laughin' our heads off and making fun of all the mascots.. But the best was Loyfatt house's. Presenting.. the 'i-fatt'. the best part was that the slogan was 'i fatt, u fatt, we fatt'. that was absolute lameness.. haha. they had to win the title given their 'perfect slogan'.

..Unfinished. Posted December 11 2007.

Vindicated

Went to watch Singapore's match against Malaysia.. The atmosphere was nice.. Rapturous in fact. Loved the atmosphere which I havent experienced for a long time.. Except in concerts.. Insults were flying everywhere too, especially at our row where we have the you-know-who. lol. He was so loud till the whole stadium collapsed. well, er, no, not insulting Liverpool fans like myself. haha..

But at first, at around 5, i met yx at tamp before going bedok to meet the rest at.. 5 pm! Kiasu Singaporeans. What can I say? And when we reached bedok, they were at mac eating. So we had to wait till about 5.30 to go kallang together. Then we reached kallang stadium at around 6, when the stadium was around one-eighth filled.. But we had to sit at a single same spot for 2 hours in the drizzling rain waiting for the match to start! Lol. Should have been as smart as yong zhi to reach the stadium at exactly 8.. And i had to run out to the main entrance through the crowds just to pass him his tickets..

Yea.. So the match started on quite a good note.. For Singapore.. Dominated the match and Malaysia had little possesion of the ball.. Everything was going well until Malaysia struck. A weak shot but it slipped through Lionel Lewis's hands and the ball crossed the line. From then on Singapore panicked and we were pumping long balls for no reason. Lionel Lewis had quite a bad game tonight.. 'Cause he could only parry away all the shots that he faced. And some of them were rather risky. But he did a great job later to save one penalty during the penalty shoot-out, albeit a weak penalty from the Malaysian player.

Before I go into the penalty-shootout, Singapore endured a nervous 2nd-half.. And for much of the second half we were shaky at the back.. But Singapore's efforts were paid off later when they grabbed a PRECIOUS equaliser. From then on Kallang stadium was louder than ever. The players seem to be more motivated to go on and win the game. Towards the end of the game, PRECIOUS had a very nice long range blistering shot that the Malaysian keeper could only tip over the top corner of the goal mouth to the back of the goal. Whew. For one moment i thought Singapore had won it.

Malaysian players were diving all over the place, probably because they were too accustomed to the flood over there? I dunno.. But we were booing them at every chance. Haha.. Plus there was this retarded M'sia fan in front of us in the Singapore fans' area cheering for Malaysia.. No surprise, he was at the end of a lot of jeering.. But he responded by holding his baby high up in the air.. Reminds you of some white celebrity right? haha..

The penalty shoot-out was nerve-wrecking.. We cheered the team on, but were afraid that it'll instead put the pressure on the Singapore players.. Indra Sahdan took the first penalty.. GOAL! The crowd went into a crazy mode. For the subsequent penalties, the atmosphere remained tense.. Then the score was 5-4.. Malaysia took the last penalty..They had to score, or face elimination..

MISS!!!

Everyone went wild. To the dismay of the malaysian fans who had travelled all the way across the straits to witness their teams' loss. To the delight of Singapore fans, we go home happy. Except for Singaporeans with a mix of Malaysian element.. This is vindication.

Final Score:
SIN 1 - 1 MAL
Singapore win 5-4 on penalties.

While some people wonder what's going on at the other side (indoor stadium).. Bet it was equally noisy.. With cute voices of the three girls from the far away country called Taiwan. Disappointment? Maybe a blessing to have saved money. Don't worry I'll think of a way somehow, ya friend? Help you get their autographs. Haha..

After that, we went home on the last train.. Reached home at about 11.50.. And survive another night.

...

Some people just don't get it.

Finally!

Today. Finally. WE'VE WON AGAINST CASHSEA. 2-0!

Chelsea was totally dominated and owned by Liverpool can! And Gerrard, Alonso weren't even at their best. =) After 2 quick goals in the first 20 minutes, scored by Kuyt and Pennant, both in spectacular fashion, Liverpool slackened the pace a bit and allowed Chelsea to have more possesion. [Kuyt with his superb ball-control and Pennant's awesome dippin' long range shot] But Chelsea still SUCK. Chelsea didn't provide any threat to Reina, and another clean sheet with ease. =) But I bet the media, especially the -you know- paper, will look upon Chelsea's line up and grieve, 'Because they didn't have a proper centre-half'. Ok, well, they're the richest team in the world and they don't have a centre-half. Wow. They could have at least bought 3 decent defenders with the cash they splashed on white elephant 'Sheva'. Wow. They had a 'star-studded' team and they complain of not havin' enough resources. Ya ya. You know the usual stuff huh.

But it doesn't really matter. Tmr, Kuan Wei and I will be celebrating wildly.

And the rest will be on Arsenal - Man Utd. Hope it ends in a draw, so the gap among the big four wouldn't be too wide. We've shown what we can do. Anyone standing in the Kop can't agree more. Not even kw. =)



<=And
this
was
sheer
skill.

Not luck,
okay.

Gordion Knot

GORDION KNOT

Runnin' into a chamber of ambers, armed with four limbs, tryin' to kill 'em
With no weapons, no armours, an ill material medium tryin' to seal 'em up
Shoutin' 'SWORDS OUT!', words out, talkin' about questions of life, you can tune 'em up
Sortin' out these disectional tools, breakin' every rule, we need to speed up
Stuck inside this cesspool, well, life is stressful, careful of your friends who are harmful
Who try to harm you, back into hindside in this time capsule, these wise guys try fool you
Every single one of 'em a ghoul, turnin' out to be cruel, blood and corpses, gruel
Fillin' up ammos, concealin' poison from your scorpio', makin' you congealed
Smackin', Whackin', exposin' your bones in your closet, revealin' the torso, through
Smoke crackin', cancer in the blood, answer in the mud, answer me - !
I'm the one and only solitary knight guardin' in the lonely night
Keepin' danger out of sight, but how am I supposed to see without light?!
Deprived of assistance, just me alone, but you can trust my crederance
Justifyin' my conscience, reminders to keepin a distance, with the devil I dance

K-bOx

Today after school, Rui Zhe, Yu Chuan, Jing Nan, Ryana, Mandy, Wai Sum and I went to the K-Box at . Went to sing from 3pm - 7pm! Sang for 4 complete hours! Although time seemed to pass by very quickly, I really enjoyed myself singing all the songs that I haven't listened to for a very long time, despite my soar throat! And Yu Chuan is a very good singer! haha.. Had a great time singing out our voices except for Jing Nan, who was rather reluctant to sing.. Don't know what she's shy about.. But towards the end she sang a couple of songs with Ryana.. Both of them can sing quite well too! And that goes without saying for Wai Sum. Maybe next time we can go K-Box more often to sing as everyone are good singers!

We left K-Box at exactly 7 because the video stopped playing once time was up! I remembered that K-Box's services did not include the auto-stop timing! We thought that we could sing until the waiter chased us out - which didn't happen.

We headed for Plaza Sing, where Jing Nan, Rui Zhe, Ryana and Yu Chuan went to have dinner together. I went to Carrefour to look for Raymond, who was with Olivia and Ms. Lee.. Raymond kept warning me about ---, but I don't heed it - he's not me, he won't understand my situation. =)

Raymond bought some DVD player before all of us went to Yoshinoya to find Yewf. Some guy was praying for Yewf.. I guess he's trying to pressurize yewf to convert to christianity! lol.. But i definitely know he's not into it.. =)

The guy beside yewf left us once we met him. We took the mrt headed to Pasir Ris and yewf was gaying around on the mrt.. haha.. i guess it's a character implanted in him already! haha..

One by one, ms. lee, olivia, raymond went home, before yewf 'escorted' me back home.. We chatted a bit on the way, before yewf decided to come my house and get a bottle of ointment from me.. He had been complaining about his stomach flu, so I lent him the ointment that I always use to treat stomach pains. Yea.. I hope it helps..

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
Fools who fell for the first girl who come their way just won't forget their very first.. Maybe.. The impression just won't go away.. I can empathise, 'cause i know how it feels. =)

It's ok?

The world outside is killin' me, like an enclosed room throttlin' me
Some bottle-poppin' and notchin' a double treble over me
Over-heat, try exhaustin' fumes of a immaculate machine
Till a point it can no longer tolerate this daily routine
At the rate it's desecratin', I'll suffocate before eighteen
An angel contemplatin' my fate, this heavy weight
I can no longer hold the boulder on my shoulder blades
Plus this endless debate put on a belate, I'll be-late
Regrets in abound, history got me to the ground
People have got their own life to live, their own lives to risk
Journeys with a first step, shoulda knew ignorance was a bliss
Exposed to rage of today's youth, the stage of a sleuth
If I never knew the truth, I would never want the proof
Friends have come and went, to find myself insulated
Fiends have come to vent, from the past to present, hate(-red)
Torments of a sinner, deserving repent..
Still, the cries of the resent..

For all the friends I used to have, I miss my past..

Innocence a virtue, if it wasn't then it couldn't be you
Protecting peace, if it doesn't, it wouldn't be an issue
But then they say the good die young, and so with that said
We shouldn't shed a tear when we see bloodshed, just go ahead
When your loved ones are as good as dead, don't be upset
Don't regret, with feelings gone but memories - don't forget
The real things' gone, but their spirits we mourn forever
Shit, we gotta live with the fact that we did them wrong forever..

This goes out to everyone who lost their loved ones..

還妳的永遠

Intro:
從前再也不會回來
難道我們都忘了愛
才會讓我無法釋懷
我們曾經互相依賴...

不知我還有什麽好期待
你不曉得我不想再等待
就將這一切捏碎成回憶
就當這份愛根本沒意義

最後的承諾也就算了吧
灌下這杯忘情水也就罷
不要計較幸福不能勉強
熬過的日子讓我自己扛

別難過結束只是個開始
只能怪我們都不太老實
日久生情絕非似曾相識
現在跟我一起捲入歷史

分手也許能夠還你自由
能夠展現我撫慰的溫柔
這句話要我怎麽說出口
無論怎樣我會繼續守候...

Crash, Crushed..

It was about 10.30 am, halfway through the Physics lecture.
Then a call came.
I picked the phone up secretly under the table..
It was kat! She was asking me the way to enter my school.. I was thinking hard, cause I had no idea why she wanted to know the way into the school. Only to find out that she and jia xin were attempting to crash! I told them to wait outside first, until the lecture ended.

After the lecture, I called them immediately, to realise they had entered the school (I don't know how).. They were at the second floor. I met rui qi at the corridor and told her to come along with me to find jia xin. She was so excited at the sight of jia xin that she rushed up to her immediately to hug her! After chatting for a while, I realised their purpose of coming into the school - to eat the chicken rice at the cafeteria! lol. I wonder what's so nice about the chicken rice that they had to crash. After tasting the chicken rice, it mystified me further 'cause i found it just average! lol. but well, if they found it nice, then i guess it's worth it. =)

They left the school after lunch, and we went to attend the GP lecture. They were off to SP to try the food there too! It was like an eating spree to them! =P I hadn't been on an eating spree in S'pore before, but I'd like to try one day too =)

After dismissal, I took bus 13 to school to meet up with Benny, Samuel Tang and the rest. The bus trip took 40 mins! By the time I reach school it was about 4.40.. Most of them have been in school for quite some time.. I ran straight to the CD Shelter to visit Mr. Lim, Coach and my juniors! Han Kuan, Mervyn, Benjamin, Edward, Nabilah, Zi Jian. It feels so weird seeing them in long pants.. lol.. Kinda have the impression that they're still in lower sec.. =\ Then I received the CCA photo! Finally! After 1 year of waiting, we finally get our photos. Other CCAs had already received their photos in Term 3 last year, but we had to wait a further 4 months to get ours. But it still reminds me a lot about the time spent interacting with the juniors! And I have, at last, get to know XianRong! The only thing I knew about her was that she was the only sec 1 who said 'Hi' to me everytime she saw me. haha.. but i forgot to ask for her email, although i did get the rest of the team's. =
Following that, I went to find Mr. Toh! We chatted for a while regarding his engagement! His wedding will probably be in November or December, but I hope I'll still be around to witness the event of his life! =) But still depends whether he'll invite me =P then he was busy with some document processing for his visit to america.. he's bringing a batch of sec 3 students to america in 2 weeks' time for the robotics competition. So he won't be around for quite some time. Mr. Tan was not around, although it was in my mind to find him. He said before that he likes to see his ex-students coming back from JCs to visit to school. He had really been a very good teacher, and someone I really respect a lot. =) So, I went to the canteen, hoping to find someone I know. To my surprise, I saw Raihan with his NCC cadet. =) We chatted a while before he noticed Sze Man at the netball court. Thinkin' that she's my crush, he challenged me to shout 'Sze Man is CUTE!' in the canteen. I did shout, but not really enough. But the next time I see Raihan in school I'll remember to shout! =) haha..

After I left the school, Samuel Tang called me to play soccer at the 'blue land'. benny, sam tang, jia kai, yong wei, jun wei, fredrick and I played soccer on the wet court.. And we kept sliding out to the grass! It was really arduous trying to play at my best when the floor is so slippery! =/

Halfway through the game, stan called me to meet up at tampines with kay, yue and yuan to have dinner together. so i had to leave the game abruptly.. I really wanted to play soccer! but i guess there'll be a next time. =)

We had dinner at pastamania, but i didn't have the appetite, so I didn't eat much. Then stan couldn't finish his serving and we had to settle it by playing 終極密碼! lol. didn't know finsihing a small plate of pasta was so torturous, not to someone like stan. haha.

However, throughout the night, I had this awkward feeling.. I can forsee what's gonna happen.. Feels like a repeat of what happened not so long ago.. Something's happenin'.. Again.

What makes me.. Me.

Hmm.. Today Yi He contacted me during school hours.. And he asked if I wanted to meet up with him, since MJC is just a few bus stops away from my house. I agreed and so, after the last lecture, I went back to Pasir Ris immediately after school.

Danial was with me as he had to make a new EZ-link card. He had lost his card and the nearest office in the East was at Pasir Ris. So he followed me from school to Pasir Ris. We chatted a lot on the MRT, and so he talked about things that happened to him whilst in secondary school.. I didn't know so many things happened to him...! He kept everything so confidential and low-profile! But now I know, I feel that I understand him better.. Maybe? haha..

Then after that Danial had to leave because he had taken his Mum's keys.. So he had to rush home to open the door for his Mum.. Coincidentally, Kekang was also at Pasir Ris MRT there! We asked him where he was going but he just wouldn't say! He's always so mysterious..

Later, I met up with Yi He at White Sands. He was originally with his O.G. but he decided to leave them just to have lunch with me! I feel so honoured! It's been a really long time since I've met him! His face hasn't changed much, but he's got a good-build! He told me he's a regular tennis player, so that explains for his physique! We had a good time laughin' about the past.. Talkin' about the so-many hilarious events that happened! So many things have happened to Maris Stella as well, including what happened to Jasper and Mrs. Tay.. R.I.P.. Although in Sec one I really missed you guys and I had a real hard time trying to adapt to a all-new environment, I don't regret not having gone to Maris Stella with you guys.. Coz it is in Temasek I've grown and matured as a person.. For if I hadn't gone to Temasek I wouldn't have met the person who changed my life.. And the person I love. People have to make decisions throughout life.. And this was a decision I'll never regret.. Even though it seems that you guys have enjoyed urselves for the past 4 years. I'm just glad at least I'm still in touch with a few of y'all.. It's been great to have known y'all. =)

Coz' even God can't change the past.

Orientation Day Three: FINALE!!!

The programmes for the Friday morning were rather boring..

First, we had Chapel at the Cultural Centre, and they made it compulsory for everyone to attend, except Muslims.. Quite unfair it can be said, because they said they were never gonna make people convert. They talked about the reason behind celebrating Christmas - for the whole morning! But the preacher is rather, er, humorous i guess? He's from England and he started off talking about himself living in Liverpool, then he dragged on to talking about Everton and Liverpool.. I don't see the relation, but well, he kept shifting our attention to other things rather than the preaching itself!

Then from 8.30 to 10am, we were back to class to register for our subject combinations.. Yu Chuan is the only guy choosing Computing! I shoulda chose that to try out computing.. Maybe I shall crash course.. haha.. But as expected, most people chose the 3S1 combi - H2 maths, H2 chem, H2 phy, H1 econs. So did I. But for the first couple of months we're just gonna crash course.. haha..

From 10 onwards till about 12, we were painting glasses for the Councillors to sell..
My painting sucks, but Kumar insisted on me painting the glass.. omg.. he sure knows how to shirk responsibility. Wtf. So I just wanted to complete the god-damn thing, and the end products is, er, atrocious. Then we had our OG photo taken! And it was used for the orientation finale slide show! A picturesque photo indeed! From a nice angle at the top! I want that picture too!

Btw,
Glass-Selling Details:
27 January (Saturday)
IMM - Sky Garden Level 3

Maybe we should go there on that day as an OG and go support Wei Qi! =)

After that was stage games, the councillors set up very nice games for us! Although I didn't play, it was entertaining! They had this blind-fold dance which I felt was a nice idea.. Then they left the person
all alone on the stage.. Haha.. Other games include picking the chocolate bar from the mess in a huge box, and The Price is Right! Can vaguely remember the other games, but it was still enjoyable!

We moved on to the final Gathering, where we finalised all our cheers, and decided on the 10 cheer leaders.. I'm one of them! So I had to shout and shout.. Till I lost my voice for the Finale!
Shoulda kept silent! =/

Anyways, after the gathering, we went on to prepare for the identity and mascott outfit.. but our group had nth to do.. so we just helped out with the others. but it was slack too.. in the end our group went to play squirrel and tree game at the basketball court.. And the mcdonald's game again! ka ling kept askin' everyone to play.. but well, at least it kept us occupied till the finale! lols..

I was expecting a camp fire or smth for the finale, but it turned out to be everything in the Cultural Centre.. AIR CON ROOM! =) after the mascott and indentity, it was the cheering competition.. Tazulla went first, and ours was the shortest cheer.. So obviously we lost the cheer competition! But for consollation, at least we won the games competition and the glass painting category!

Finale passed by very fast indeed, and then we moved on to 'disco partying'. Actually the band that came to perform sucked, including the singer and guitarists as well, but everyone was so high! for no apparent reason whatsoever! the ambience and atmosphere was there, and yu chuan, me, rui zhe, jingnan, wan ting and especially wai sum got very high! kept jumping around till I ran out of breathe.. Kept coughing.. but at least it shows that everyone sure knows how to enjoy themselves! seems like quite a jc i'm joining..! =)

once the concert ended, we all went macdonalds to eat.. About half the OG went, except for Rei, Jothi, Arun, Kumar, Ahjid and the others.. But almost everyone actively involved in the orientation was there! we wanted to call wei qi to join us too, but she was locked in school, and had to give it a pass.. but nonetheless, we still took many pictures and talked about a lot of things till it was about 11 and time to go home! a day just passed in a flash, but as i recount all the events that happened, i'd reckon this orientation has been an enjoyable one.. At least now I know quite a few ppl in the school!

Now, I really look forward to staying in sajc.. Until I see what happens next in the next couple of months. =)

Overshadowed..

Today was orientation day two. Was much better than yday.

The first thing in the Morning was 'MAN HUNT!' But it turned out to be some competition where a guy from an Orientation Group (OG) had to go onstage to 'show his muscles' by doing some weird actions.. Then it turned out to be that the judging criteria was 'the amount of arm pit hair'.. The most arm pit hair person wins! It was kinda lame, but it got everyone laughing at the guys' posts! =P

Then it was time for the second guy to go onstage.. And I was chosen.. This time it wasn't for some competition or what - I was elected tribal warrior! =Z Had to lead them in cheering and everything.. So unlike me..

Just before lunch, as we were walking to the canteen, suddenly Wan Ting asked Rui Zhe where he was from.. And suddenly everyone started to go like: "I'm from..".. Yea. and in the end we realised something.. Almost everyone is a foreigner! Partly la.. As in, some ppl change their citizenship.. But it still counts anyway. There's like 4 china ppl (rui zhe, yu chuan, wan ting, jing nan) , 1 korean (Jisoo), 2 hong konger (wai sum, ..), 1 malaysian, 1 japanese (rei), 1 indonesian and 1 taiwanese.. Yea! haha.. sounds nice with so many ppl from diff background. =) and i just found out that yu chuan plays all the chinese games i thought nobody would play. =)

Rei plays soccer, as well as the other SJI guys (Jothi).. Finally someone who can play soccer with me! Or else I'd be stuck with basketballers (Rui Zhe, Jeff) Sounds like it'll be quite a nice time being with these ppl. =)

After lunch, we played "The Trial", and it was during this period of time, everyone started to get very enthu.. As in, Rui Zhe of today and yday were 2 diff people! He cheered till he broke his voice or smth.. Lol. Then OG 27 came up with new cheers! Finally! And the 'hello to station master!' got us a lot of points during the game, although i still dunno what those points are for.. no prizes!

The games had to be stopped halfway 'cause of the bad weather. So our group sat down and talked abt a few things.. With Wei Qi constantly urging us to talk.. =P and then we decided to have dinner after school (although it was decided yesterday). we exchanged numbers too, so that we could keep in touch as an OG even after we split up. i still find the girls and the sji/ victoria guys in our group very quiet.. afterall, they were from single-sex schools. maybe they just need sometime to settle into the new environment i guess. [But girls from other groups are beginning to cheer with their penetrating voices!]

So, after school, all of us went to the Mac nearby to eat. Yu Chuan actually wanted to give it a pass so that he could have his voice back by avoiding fried food. but in the end he gave in and ate mac with us. seems like we foiled his plans. =X we were at mac for about 1.5 hours, talking about various stuff, and particularly, Jeffrey, blabbering about how pathetic his secondary school was. We had a good laugh, and really, we got to understand and find out more about each other. =)

We went to buy the paint brush and then went back home together, though i was the only guy taking mrt to kovan. but everyone started to hug and all.. So warm-hearted! =)

Orientation Day One

Found St. Andrew's JC quite a nice place to be in. =)

Today was orientation day, met danial at potong pasir at 6.30p.m to go to sch together. (WHAT THE HELL) Didn't know the way to school, if not we could have walked there. Reached there at about 6.50 when the reporting time was 7.25! We wasted our time la!

Then when I reached school, I met quite a few of friends whom I've lost contact with. Zhi Yi was surprised to see me, but he said he couldnt recognise me till I told him my name! And I forgot his name too! Lolx..! I and Danial then went to check our groupings, wishing that we'd get into the same group, but we should have known - he was in the arts stream while i was in the science stream. He was in OG07 while I was in OG27.

We had to part ways when we had to report at the Cultural Centre. At first I felt kinda comfortable in being inside the air-conditioned room, till I found out that everyone was kinda.. er.. strangerous, and unwillning to talk. But well, afterall, no one knows each other. But that was what the orientation was for. For us to get to know each other.

The ice-breakers started on a low. Our group leader couldn't get us to get the ball rolling; everyone was too, nervous i should say, to play the games. Even when we were just introducing ourselves, everyone spoke so softly I could hardly rmbr any of my group members' names! But after a series of games, like WHACKO!, the fifty-cent game, the attention game and the back-to-back game, i got to memorise some of their names. We had to, or we had to do some forfeit. And included in one of the forfeits was to run up to a student councillor and shout 'YOU'RE PRETTY!' lolx. not really considered a forfeit but it was damn funny at that point of time. =)

Then the highlight of the ice-breakers came. The 'husband and wife' game. Someone had to go chase another person while he or she finds a partner. Although it didnt help us get to know each other better, at least it helped us to pass the time. =)

Following that, it was a really mundane session of subject-briefing. Kept falling asleep, then Kumar kept waking me up when he noticed that the teacher was looking at me.. Lol. But honestly, I don't recall anything of that worth remembering.

Soon, it was lunch, then i met up with kekang at the canteen.. He was talking to me after we ate, and he kept blabbering to me about all the short and cute girls he saw. 'there he goes again!' =S

After lunch the whole science stream went to play games at the hall. We played husband-and-wife again.. Pretty lame i'd say, but the councillors seemed to enjoyed themselves.. The funny thing came afterwards, when we played this game where we were supposed to follow the instructions given by the councillor to touch the stranded tapes pasted on the floor with whatever part of the body they asked us to and according to the colour of the tape. Those who failed to do so before the councillor caught us will have to do forfeit. Because the tapes were really very limited and few, we tried to be funny and just sat anywhere we liked. The others followed, thinking there really was a tape there. We laughed and laughed, but a lot of people still didn't have a clue as to what happened! The councillors sensed something wrong, so he asked for us to "touch the black tapes with our index finger". A lot of people learned from us, and started to sit on empty places and confused others to think there really was a black tape pasted on the wooden floor. The councillor then announced: 'there isn't any black tape!'

I guess it really was the games that got us starting. Jeff was elected OG rep, and he really tried his best to lead the group. The team was more united, and we cheered louder than ever. (Although sadly, Trazulla still was the worst-performing tribe) =S he was, to a great extent, effective. I got to know Rui Zhen, Yu Chuan, Arrun, and Wan Ting, someone who kat speculates is her pri sch friend.

Anyways, they're a group of really friendly people, and we're even meeting up tmr night to have dinner after the orientation!

Really looking forward to the upcoming days at sajc. hope to know more people. =)

Return: Pulse, Splitz..

Sorry for this late post..
Been pretty lazy lately.. haha..

I've returned to Singapore on the 23rd of December, around 11.30p.m. ..
It feels weird actually, to be back in Singapore..

Perhaps.. Maybe.. And I guess, I miss Taiwan.

After spending about one month over there, and after spending so many good times over there with my relatives, I've left much of my memories there.. Good ones..

I don't know when I'll be back, and even by then, I'm not sure if things will stay the same. Well, this is life. But it's also great to be back, and I'm looking forward to a brand new lease of life. =)

-still waiting for photos to be sent over- =Z

It feels so good to be BACK!

Life away from that tiny island..
Back to where I feel I belong..

Having arrived back here in Taiwan on the 28th Nov, I have been enjoying my stay over here... Over the past few days, I've been helping out with household chores because my grandparents really have a problem cleaning the house themselves.. Especially given the condition of my grandma.. It's not helped by my two little cousins in the house.. They help mess up the place right after we've tidied the place. =P Nonetheless, the place is comparitively neater and tidier now. No more empty boxes in the toilet, no more stained walls, no more uselss papers all over the living room, no more torn and smelly clothes in the empty room previously occupied by my uncle. I feel some sense of achievement - all these done by my mum and I =)

Winter season. Temperatures at around 14/ 15 degrees Celcius is really cooling.. And eating those 50cm-tall ice-cream and cold dessert in the natural air-conditioned surrounding makes it all the better. I love this feeling. Absolutely. And when my brother comes next week we're gonna play soccer. I can imagine the cold air feeling my lungs when I run... I just can't describe this feeling.. Like your lungs are gonna burst.. But you just feel that you have the unlimited energy within you to continue running and enable your lungs to run on the engine.. =)

During these few days I've been on an eating spree with my relatives.. I don't know how they do it, but they just seem to know where to get all the best food in this country =) From the alleys to the streets to night markets to restaurants, I don't think I've missed any good food. =) But the thought of gaining weight has put me off from eating.. But I can't help it.. I know it'd bad to eat too much in the night, but the 'real taiwan' only becomes alive at night =)
*I'll be posting some pictures of my family and I once I get the disk for the digital camera. =)

Lately, I've also been walking around the streets aimlessly with my elder cousin. We watched DEATH NOTE: The Last Name. I think it's not showing in Singapore yet, but I'd like to comment on it first. It's a nice movie if you know the story. But if you don't, you'd probably be clueless about the sequence of events. The edited version of the story will, however, dissapoint those who have read the comic. But I guess they had to shorten the whole story, or else the movie would probably go on and on and on...

And oh, in the comic, L dies before Light dies, but in the movie Light does before L dies. =Z

Besides that, I've been playing PS2 with my cousin.. Winning Eleven 10! We can play the god-damn box till early morning the next day. Our record: lights off at 6.30am. =P Fortunately he's having school vacation now.. So he can spend the whole night playing with me. Lolx. Then we wake up the next morning to 'report' to my uncle's noodle shop to help out... Surprisingly, I don't feel tired at all! =) I think I'm used to sleeping late now. =)

All these are to be short-lived though, 'cause nothing can stay forever.. I don't think anyone can feel the pleasure I'm feeling, so I'm really glad to be back.. In another 3 weeks I'll be back to where I left, so I might as well enjoy myself to the fullest extent whilst time flies.
[And while the elections fever is back.. Now I see the old politics-crazy Taiwan.. haha.. ]

Hmm.. I wonder what the rest of you guys doing over there?

Grad Nite '06

Graduation Night '06
23 November 2006



Morning:

Went to bugis with yewf to get his pair of leather shoes. gosh he bought a pair of very ugly shoes which i initially objected him buying. but i reluctantly agreed to let him choose 'cause we were runnin' late. Man he is sure conservative and choosy about things. Lol.


Afternoon:

Yew Fong, Jordan, Yu Xiang met at my house to go to school together.


-Yu Xiang: dressed in white suit with a black blazer and long pants (not school pants). Man he looks very different today. Very 'GLAMOUR'.


-Yewf: dressed in the ultimate gay colour - purple (long sleeve shirt) and long pants. He looks smart today. Really very unlike him - lookin' 'lost' - everyday in school. haha.


-Jordan: gosh. That was really gay. He wore an exactly identical shirt (long sleeve, blue vertical-lined pattern) as mine. I was utterly shocked to see someone wearing the exactly same shirt as me. We looked like brothers - or couples - or smth. Lol. And his pants colour didn't vary too much as mine. He must have copied my style or smth. Lol.


-Me. Dun talk abt it. Show u the picture of WeiJie and I. Lol.

Didn't really get a lot of pictures from the other ppl I think. Not much la.

Should try to get more from other ppl.

The Night:

Mary Anne, Ezra, Raihan, Samuel, Shawn, Jun Ji, Jordan, Jonathan, Yew Fong and I sat at the same table. Then throughout the whole thing I was joking around with Yew Fong and Raihan. Yewf ah.. Naughty. Keep looking at the -shall-not-be-named- sc. From band one lor. haha. well. last week leh. dun think there's anymore chance for u la huh. haha..

Anyways Zizie was chosen Princess as she won the runner-up by 1 vote. I voted for Zizie ok. Shows how much my vote meant to her. lol.

Anyways, the highlight of the night wasn't really anyone else..

But her. Despite being normally dressed and that she didn't put on make up to outshine the rest, she was, in my eyes, the prettiest one tonight.. But I dunno how long it'll last..

Afterall, someone said before:

美麗不是永恒的，但醜陋卻是永恒的.

haha. well. ppl may disagree but i don't care.

Birthday Girl, you were really the prettiest.

Grad Nite '06 GLAMOUR.

I don't think we'll ever keep in touch again, but yea. F it.

Textbook..

Education? Seems like exhumation of the living dead..

Ten years, fucking education, mixin' around with cats and dawgs
To drive living brains or become stupid as fuck like fucking logs
And the next morning you wake up you see whores, unconscious, fucking dogs
Wasted, fuck this shit, who's the time keeper who's rubbing these fucking clocks?
Torturous, mental horrors amplified, rapturous, echoes, dangerous
4 million fuckin' people seein' each other every day, yet strangerous
Wonderous, love makes the world go round, then tell me why there's no sound
Sigh, bears go astound-ed, this world seems to be against me, surrounded
The king who ruled the country with an iron fist, invisible yet invincible
Incredible or credible, these books, edible or inedible, history indelible
But these data are liable to get you brainwashed, 'so you're talking back'?
Fuck the government, you fucking cash raper, no worse than the grim ripper
Than the dream seeper, holy or unholy, live lonely or homely
'Home me or loan me,' pleads to the establishment, refused and rejected
'Tone me or moan me,' bleeds two, the compliment, defused and dejected
Eject or erect, subjective or objective, no body can give a fuck-less about success


The beloved undertaker

That type of life given to you, you just wont accept it
The more ignorant people get, the more I wanna stab it
Adept in it, I'm the except-ion, what they do, self-deception
How nice would life be if the world undergoes self-destruction
I'm pretending I'm not hearing no shit, false pretension tensions
The beloved undertaker, see these maniacs in action
But you need to get your brain relaxin', or stop heavy taxin'
How about some nervy waxin'? Or some chevy flexion?
We need some care and affection, so stop giving inspections
Give me some hope resurrection, maybe some dope injections
I need a life more than a living, so tell me the point of breathing
Sell me the fifth ring, but where's the first ring for these cursings?
I'm so thirsty, in the Sahara Desert, does that mean I have to convert?
Maybe I have to alert my army, but I know why they are inert
Brief flirtation with religion, but it got me complacent
To know what the cross represents, now nobody resents

The beloved undertaker.. Understand what their words meant?

Seize it tight in your hands

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
-Mark Twain, American novelist/writer/lecturer (November 30, 1835 – April 21, 1910)

RE: Contents of your life

Seize it tight in your hands.
The present.

A life living for others ain't a life worth living for..

If you consider yourself as a brainless door
A painless whore, a sex tool to serve desperate bachelors
Never met happiness until she retires
Who ever conducted her to set her desires on fire
Models in magazines, she only admires
And gets back to life satisfying sexual desires
I'm twining this movie scene back to modern society
Where you'd get to see the complete complexity
First and third worlds, separated by these subtle screens
Disgusted, ignorant as can be in scuttled scenes
You can say I'm exaggerating, but I'm literal
I'm nothin' but the truth, proof, this example's simple

When I open my mouth, ample examples tape your mouth
Simple mathematics, the system's systematic
I'm asthmetic, if you see runners become dope addicts
It's hard and strict, rules making you become convicts
Be a prick, if you still can't figure out then suck a dick
Get a nick, maybe you can see our king's sick
He wants to rip you apart, slash your hearts - that's his art
Play your part, realise your life's set as a chart
Flick a brick with tricks, see how quick the clock clicks and ticks
Most of our lives been spent satisfying the sick
It's sick, they've been ripping benefits and we go through this shit?
The times spent in the office, but why can't we just quit?

If we could all just relax, sit back and think about it
Quit our jobs, settle for something we can commit
Twenty years down the road, see the life story we unfold
Then there's no reason we should end up as scapegoats
Danger, risk, every rhyme is a weapon, is a dagger
But the truth rejoices, I'll rather roll than stagger
We can all hear silence in every voice, the future poise
Loneliness in darkness, choiceless in every choice
So the next time you see fucking screens in front of your face
Save yourself from wasting life away in this place
If anyone wanted speed in their fucking life to succeed
Then well you could aimlessly heed what the greed needs

.. The cherished present, the relished future..

The present is gratifyin', everyday is satisfyin'
I reached for her hand and held it tight, the feelin' so mystifyin'..
It's unbelievable, but I've never came closer than this
Man in bliss, this chance probably never comes closer, I can't miss
When I reminisce about my sad past, mistakes, I won't repeat
I'm not gonna be a victim for another case of deceit
I don't promise, I don't owe to no god no dogs, no clocks no time
I'm not sure she's mine, but I know that she drives me outa my mind
From the first time we met, we started closer than close, love I suppose?
So this was the path we chose, only we know, our story forms prose
How I used to change my targets like changing clothes, but now I know
No matter where I go, my emotion has grown, so let's just start.. Slow.

23rd October 2006
Unforgetable.

The evidence?

His arms were straining, while he just sat down alone with his heart paining
His palms stained with bloodshed, not literally, on his passage to gain things
It's a saint thing, people got him gunning down with invisible weapons
Invincibles in them, time ticks by, breathing heavier at every second
Regret, guilty conscience struck in him, angels of devils got him staring
So you see him standing on the stage starring, roots of evil got him earrings
Hot things, we had to shot him, stab him, grab them, heck, just leave them mourning
Grieve them mornings, fifth in line for the scorning, gift in the mind, saying 'sorry's
Till they wake up in the morning trembling and scrambling, guilty in the heart
Filthy in the art, this moment they could be saying they really suck
And the next time they could be kings, shame to be deceived, clings
Blink, now wishing they sink, wishing they be selling onion rings at burger kings
Hunger kings, equipped with acquisitive heart, now I feel pain in the butt
In the neck, how great if they could just spit and spat and just tell the truth, but
In the deck, we shuffle and scuffle, angry at everytime they drive us mad
Revive the sad, when they know I could be the truth, now tell me who needs the proof?

Who needs to move, they pointing rifles at us, ganging at us, banging at lust
Dissapointing us, we were the ones who were appointing trust, unjust..
Now nobody knows who to trust, burning money in hell before they rust
So all I ask, "Do they mask? What's their task?" They disgust, "IT'S IN THEIR BLOOD!"
Hiddin' guns in the mud, put on a false face 'cause they start cryin' hard
Dying hard, I could consider trying hard to discard 'the card'; wild card
Burning in the greed of flame, rid of fame, how much I wish I could meet the tamed
I need my name, speaking in the creed of game, who's insane, now 'STRIP THE SANE'
This time I lead them through the lake of clarity, all to shake reality
Clean the face of the charred, praise the scarred, now now, show me what's 'true charity'
Nobody ever proves the verity, only put me through insularity
Hollerin' how lyrically overflowed I am with vulgarities
Sanity! God is prononouced Saint-ly, this dog denounced words of the bible
In this time that we live in, from the air that we breathe in, SWORDS ON THE DOUBLE

Never wanted to ask for trouble, provoke your beliefs that you called it

But we people living just to prove it.. It's stupid isn't it? It's just stupid..

Predictions proven true?

But there's so many people livin' in this god damn world..

Is it a mere coincidence?

Tryin' to discredit the works of people by sayin' it was written..

So where's your evidence?